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How to Ask for Money

For the Couple who has Everything

1. Do not put your request anywhere on or near your invitation. Even if you have a cute little poem, this is still a big no-no. It’s gauche to ask anyone for money as your wedding gift.

2. Let others help your request be known. Task your family, close friends and bridal party with spreading the word.

3. Register for just a few gifts anyway. Some of your guests may not like or want to give you money. You have to respect that. So make a small selection of gifts for your registry.

 

4. Follow the 4 Bs if someone outright asks. The scene in the television show The Office was really cute when Pam was trying to subtly tell her co-workers she and Jim wanted money. But folks never get the point when you beat around the bush.

• Be Honest. Someone might get wind of you wanting money rather than a gift. If you’re asked directly, don’t lie.  
• Be Brief. Don’t go into a longwinded explanation. Just get to the point and keep it simple.  
• Be prepared. Have a semi-canned statement prepared so you don’t get tripped up with your words. “Steve and I want to start our savings for a house, so if you’d like we’d love for you to contribute to it.”  
• Be Grateful. Make sure your statement is dripping with warmth and kindness. “… but the choice is entirely up to you. And either way, what’s most important is that you are all there to spend our special day with us.”  

The bottom line is discretion, humility and kindness is the key to pulling this off with grace and style!

Elaine Swann is a San Diego based Lifestyle and Etiquette expert who provides brides one-on-one consulting on traditional and modern wedding etiquette. Considered an authority on etiquette and lifestyle practices, Elaine’s advice has been called upon by ABC, NBC, CBS, CW, Fox, KUSI, and Wealth TV. She’s been featured on radio programs, and print publications such as Modern Bride Magazine, Exquisite Weddings Magazine, and more. You can explore free tips and wedding etiquette advice at her website ElaineSwann.com.

For more of Elaine's etiquette tips, click here.

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