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Interview with David Tutera

An inside peek at an A-list party: ideas and inspiration from celebrity party planner.

SOME BRIDES HAVE HAD their dream wedding planned in their heads since they were little girls. For others, the planning begins the minute they become engaged. All brides have one thing in common, however: They appreciate help in putting their big day together. Luckily, that’s where David Tutera comes in. A leading expert in entertaining, Tutera has been planning events since age 19 and has built a reputation for style, elegance, creativity and artistry. From Star Jones’ luxurious wedding to post-Grammy Award star-studded fêtes, Tutera has designed unique events for an impressive list of celebrities, royalty, politicians and socialites. Exquisite Weddings had the opportunity to ask David about the keys to his success—and the successful fulfillment of any bride’s wedding dreams.

Wedding Philosophies

You have said that weddings have to tell a story. What should brides consider when preparing to tell their story to their guests? When planning a wedding, it’s important to tell the couple’s story. Brides need to make sure each guest leaves the wedding knowing more about the couple than before and feeling like they were part of the celebration, rather than just watching the wedding. Brides and grooms should consider accenting all of the wedding details with touches from each of the couple’s personality. A great way to add personality is to have favors that combine a personal connection. For example, for a fall wedding, have a bundle of apples for each guest with your grandmother’s famous apple pie recipe attached.

What aspects about the couple should be included in the wedding planning? It’s the couple telling their story, so any important moments that are special to the couple should be included—focusing on how they met and how they built their relationship is a wonderful and touching way to allow guests to get to know them better. It’s more about the past than their future plans. You can also express what’s unique about them in a variety of different ways—style of cuisine, for example, if you have a bride and groom with two different ethnic or cultural backgrounds. I’ve done a first course dedicated to one of their cultures and a second dedicated to the other. For instance, if you have an Indian bride marrying an Italian groom, have an Indian first course and an entrée related to Italian cuisine so you’re introducing both cultures in one menu.

You can also follow the same technique with the music. I had one wedding where the bride was from New York and the groom was from Texas. The rehearsal dinner was a Tex-Mex barbecue with a country-western band, and it was an evening in honor of his family—the Texans who came to New York. The New Yorkers had their party on Saturday. It was a cool way of doing it.

What is your most important philosophy about planning a dream wedding? A dream wedding is all about the attention to details. You want your guests to experience a wedding like never before—creating everlasting memories. Add your personal touch to every detail, from escort cards and place cards, to unique cocktails and menus, to the flowers and décor, to the party flow and energy, to the music and dancing. Really think and create something unique and special for every aspect.

What is one thing a bride should never scrimp on in her wedding planning? Or, what is the most important thing to indulge in? Every wedding is different and tailored to a couple’s taste. A bride should never skimp on the elements that are most important to her. A successful wedding is well balanced; you wouldn’t want to indulge in a great band and then not have the appropriate sound and lighting. The key is to work within your overall budget and make sure all the elements are there.

What trends are you really into right now? It’s really fun to create a different flow to weddings: Have the ceremony in one location, then dinner with toasts in another, then a third for dessert and dancing. It keeps your guests moving and involved and breaks the “normal” flow. One bride I worked with had three wedding fantasies: to get married in her parents’ house, to get married on a beach and to get married in a ballroom. We had the ceremony in the home, put the guests on trolleys to the beach and had the reception in a tent designed like a ballroom. Her three fantasies all came true by making this happen.

I’m in love with the flow timeline. Another wedding I’m doing has the guests arrive for cocktails, then go into a tent to sit down for a full two-course dinner, then leave the dinner tent and go to the ceremony. When that concludes they will hear music in the tent where they had dinner, but the room will be changed over to a dessert lounge. What’s cool about the formula is that the bride is always with the guests. Typically, you do the ceremony and then have cocktails, but the bride and groom aren’t in the cocktail hour because they’re taking pictures. With this timeline, the only thing we’re doing is extracting the bride after cocktails so she can get changed into the wedding dress. I’m so excited about it.

Planning from Day One

From the announcement of the engagement up until the wedding itself, how important are parties? Each of the parties is important, as are the guests that you invite—it’s all about bringing the people in your lives together to celebrate and to get to know each other’s families. The parties should be kept simple and fun and the focus should be on the wedding. The theme should be the couple and “love,” but each party should feel different because it’s going to be in the energy you create. You do that in the way you serve the food, the sit-down dinner versus the buffet, and the music you play. Friday night is more casual and allows people to be able to react, more so than the more regimented and structured Saturday. The last celebration would be if you’re doing a destination wedding where you have a farewell brunch. That’s the most casual celebration—it’s like a fly-by open house kind of feel, to reminisce about the weekend.

What are the most crucial things to keep in mind when choosing colors for the wedding and its theme? The most important things to keep in mind are the time of year and your location. Because flowers come from all over the world, you can get most flowers year-round. Don’t worry about seasons.

A theme is the wrong way to go; a style is the better way. A theme turns something into kitsch. Pick a style—a Tuscan dinner, a Gatsby look—and it shows in the food you serve, the music, the décor. One wedding I’m doing is a black-tie event in a tent, except that it has a modern feel, still warm in style because even though it’s an all-white affair, the one accent color is pewter gray. The couple didn’t want an old-society band because it’s a younger group. We needed a band that went with the chic and sophisticated style, but with a younger singer. We went with a band that’s like Frank Sinatra meets Harry Connick, Jr. meets Michael Buble. It all has to fit and it has to match the couple and the audience.

I know you work closely with caterers in your party planning. Is there one key question a bride should ask when choosing a caterer? It’s very important to schedule a tasting so that you will know exactly what you will be getting—not only the taste, but the presentation. Also, make sure that the caterer knows that you want each course served and cleared in 30-minute intervals. This keeps the pace of the party going.

How do accessories help make a wedding unique to each couple? This is part of what makes a wedding tell the story—focusing on the details. Create a specialty drink with a unique name and a color that matches the wedding, favors that are customized and special to the couple, adding your favorite quotes to printed materials or having someone special speak at the ceremony. It’s also fun to show the couple’s personality with drinks. A lot of people coming to a wedding may not know the couple has nicknames for each other. Design specialty cocktails using those nicknames.

You say you indulge all five senses in planning any party. Why is this necessary to create a perfect wedding and what is an example of how this is done? The touch, the smell, the taste, the sight and the sound are the five senses that should be engaged all at the same time at every wedding. This will ensure a well-rounded and balanced party. If all five senses are enticed, your guests will walk away remembering all of the elements: smelling the fragrances, seeing the fabrics, candles and the décor, tasting all the specialty drinks, touching the great silk or velvet tablecloths and definitely hearing all the wonderful music.

Finally, what do you enjoy most about working with a bride and groom to plan their wedding? Every single day is completely different, and it’s the only thing I can think of that gives people complete joy. It’s giving them six hours of simple, pure fun, and I love to watch it unfold.

David Tutera’s one-hour primetime television series, Party Planner with David Tutera, airs on the Discovery Home Channel. In stores now are David’s four books: Big Birthdays, The Party Planner, America Entertains: A Year of Imaginative Parties and A Passion for Parties: Your Guide to Elegant Entertaining.

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